August 8, 2012 in Things to do close to home
Picture this. You’re in a pitch black room. You strain your eyes in an attempt to see something–anything!–but it’s no use. Fear and adrenaline course through your veins and you just hope the enemy can’t hear the heart pounding in your chest.
Suddenly a small glowing orb of light appears across the room, seemingly floating in mid-air. You know better. But before you can say “oh, crap!” the ball of light comes hurtling toward you and you’re struck between the eyes by a hard, plastic, glow-in-the-dark toy.
You cry out in pain and immediately regret it as you give your position away to the others. Two more blows to the head and one to the chest shuts you up and you crawl to a safer location.
Welcome to this week’s Backyard Badge of Awesome: Glow-in-the-dark Fights.
As a kid we used to play this game a lot. And just so we’re clear: it’s dangerous, stupid and a good way to get hurt. So read on and participate at your own risk. Getting everybody to wear safety goggles or a helmet may be a good idea.
What you’ll need
- A bunch of glow-in-the-dark toys. The toys we had as kids called “Glow Worms” served us very well. They were a good size and made of pretty hard plastic, making them ideal projectiles. We also had a number of other little toys that glowed in the dark to round out our arsenals.
- A pitch dark room. The game works best in larger spaces when no one can see anyone else. A windowless basement or large room with blackout curtains work great.
- Players stupid enough to participate. You can divide into teams if you have a large number of people or play individually for smaller groups.
I use the word “rules” loosely here. But basically the idea is to hit your opponents as often, and as violently, as possible with your glow-in-the-dark projectiles.
Each person or team begins with a evenly distributed arsenal of projectiles.
The lights are turned off and players find themselves a good place to position themselves. You can set up boxes or use furniture to act as cover but the more open the space the more exciting it will be.
Then it’s basically a free-for-all with glowing toys flying through the air and clocking people in the head.
The game ends when someone gets hit in the eye or your parents find out what you’ve been doing.
A word on strategy
As senseless and chaotic as glow-in-the dark fights may appear, strategy does come into play. Patience and regularly repositioning yourself will serve you well. Keeping your items in your pants or otherwise out of sight helps too.
Another technique that will most certainly be utilized is the ol’ “Dangling Worm”.
This is a great way to locate an enemy. You’ll need at least two projectiles to pull this off. Ideally one wimpy, crappy toy and one larger, heftier missile.
Step 1: Discreetly toss one of your crappy glow-in-the-dark items into the middle of the battlefield.
Step 2: Wait.
Step 3: Crappy though the discarded item may be, inevitably the urge to take it will prove too much to bear for another player. Keep your eye on the your bait and the second you see it disappear you’ll know someone has grabbed it. Stand up, wind up your bigger missile and fire away.
Dive back under cover and smile in smug satisfaction as your enemy groans in defeat.
Got a variation of the game you’d like to suggest? Add ‘em to the comments!
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