I wouldn’t describe my mom and dad as helicopter parents. Partly because giving us a long leash was just their parenting style. Partly because with eight kids running around like a bunch of maniacs, you’d need a whole fleet of helicopters to keep track of us. Continue reading
“Kids these days.” It’s a familiar expression used to express disapproval of how far today’s youth have drifted from the virtuous and well-behaved ways of their elders. But you only need to hear a few stories from my dad about his ridiculous childhood shenanigans to see what a crock that is.
Case in point: the fateful Christmas he got a BB gun. Continue reading
Farts. The butt of so many jokes. The joke of so many butts. Growing up, I firmly believed that flatulence was infinitely funny; that cranking one out and laughter went hand in hand. Always.
But a winter camping trip with some friends proved I was wrong. Dead, stinking wrong. Emphasis on the stinking. Continue reading
There are 3 items on my ultimate bucket list. Joining Captain Dick’s World Famous Sour Toe Cocktail Club is one of them. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this… unusual… drinking tradition, Sour Toe cocktails are found exclusively at the Downtown Hotel bar in Dawson City, Yukon, Canada. Entry into the prestigious club is easy enough: you simply have to drink a shot of whiskey… Oh yeah, and your class has a severed human toe in it, which must touch your lips as you take your drink. Continue reading
Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without.
My back sucks. Partly due to bad posture. Partly due to an aversion core-strengthening exercises like sit-ups. Partly due to the unhealthy ergonomics that come with using a kitchen table and wooden chair as a desk. Continue reading
Cutting corners in life can have painful results.
Whoever said two heads are better than one clearly weren’t thinking of me and my brother Nicholas. Individually, we could make sensible—even smart—choices. Together? Yeah, not so much. As teenagers, we’d often hatch plans that seldom went smoothly, like the time we decided to embark on a two day hike up the Nine Mile River near our home in rural Southwestern Ontario. Continue reading
In August 2013, my girlfriend Ashley and I loaded up my Hyundai Accent and struck out from Waterloo, Ontario on our way to Vancouver, British Columbia. We drove through the US on our journey west, and indeed, it was a very American experience. Continue reading
Whenever my extended family gets together you can usually count on three things: a lot of boxed wine, a lot of Euchre and a lot of jackassery. Our Easter celebration a couple years ago delivered on all three counts and included an activity that my Van Osch cousins came up with: the Blindfold Game. Continue reading
A lot of words come to mind when thinking about debt. Stuck. Mired. Drowning. Buried. The images these words conjure up remind me of a story from my childhood.
As a kid, my youngest sister Meghan would often join my brother Nicholas and me on our adventures to the “Death Cliffs”. Admittedly, a bit of an exaggerated moniker. The Death Cliffs were in fact a section of high muddy banks along the Nine Mile River near our hometown of Port Albert, Ontario. Continue reading
We’ve all heard the expression “I’m buried in work.” Of course, it’s usually meant figuratively. But there was this one time when I got to witness the literal application of this old adage. Continue reading
Before we somehow managed to find ourselves girlfriends, my roommate Shane and I were typical bachelors in many ways. I had a Superman poster in my bedroom. Shane had a bunch of Star Wars toys in his. The furniture in our place was a mishmash of used pieces, chosen for utility and convenience over what’s stylish or “in”. You’d find a stack of comic books behind the toilet in our bathroom. Continue reading
“With great power comes great responsibility.” – Voltaire (and Uncle Ben from Spiderman, of course)
My eyes snapped open as I heard the low and menacing growl nearby. Even with my eyes as wide as they were, I couldn’t see much. It was late and our campfire was out. Though engulfed in darkness I could still tell that my brother Nicholas and cousin Adam, wrapped in their sleeping bags next to me, were awake now too. Continue reading