Lessons learned from banshee babies and buttered butts

The road to mastery is paved with failures and face palms. Honing a skill means putting in the time to get better at it — and being ok with the mediocre and downright awful results along the way.

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Consider this

A 2016 research study recruited college students taking a physics course. After completing a quiz, some students were asked to review their mistakes, figure out where they went wrong and write down their thoughts on how to fix their solutions. Other students didn’t analyze their own errors.

Later, all students were given similar problems to solve again. The results showed that students who analyzed their own mistakes performed better, suggesting that thinking critically about errors can lead to stronger problem-solving skills and deeper understanding. The findings support the idea that learning from failure can be a powerful way to build resilience and improve your performance.

Reflection questions

1. Think of a time you failed at something meaningful. What did you learn from that experience that you couldn’t have learned otherwise?
   
2. How do you typically respond to failure — emotionally and practically? What would it look like to respond with curiosity instead of judgment?
   
3. What’s a past mistake that, in hindsight, helped you grow stronger or wiser? How has it shaped who you are today?
   
4. What fears do you have around failing? How might those fears be holding you back from trying something new or taking a risk?
   
5. When you see others fail, how do you react? How does that compare to how you treat yourself in similar situations?
   
6. What’s something you’ve been avoiding because you’re afraid you won’t succeed? What’s one small step you could take anyway?
   
7. How do you define success for yourself — and how does that definition allow (or not allow) room for failure and learning?
   
8. Who in your life models resilience in the face of failure? What can you learn from the way they handle setbacks?
   
9. What supports, mindsets or tools help you bounce back after a disappointment or failure? How can you lean into those more intentionally?
   
10. If you knew failure was part of the path to something worthwhile, how would that change the way you show up in your life right now?

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Turn ideas into action with these suggested activities from our Resilience Toolbox.

More modules

Module 1. Making your own luck: Lessons learned from a coin flip

Module 2. Improving adaptability: Lessons learned from an absurd Christmas tree

Module 3. Embracing teamwork: Lessons learned from a rogue haybale

Module 4. Leveraging tools: Lessons learned from a poorly chosen sledgehammer

Module 5. Learning humility: Lessons learned from a very brief career as a valet

Module 6. Failing forward: Lessons learned from banshee babies and buttered butts

Module 7. Avoiding shortcuts: Lessons learned from a giant backpack

Module 8. Redefining success: Lessons learned from an idiotic bet

Module 9. Letting go: Lessons learned from a gooey pit of clay

Module 10. Taking responsibility: Lessons learned from trying to catch a train

Module 11. Getting creative: Lessons learned from the toboggan hill

Module 12. Fuelling motivation: Lessons learned from sleeping in a barn

Module 13. Handing over control: Lessons learned from riding in a shopping cart

Module 14. Practising gratitude: Lessons learned from a very special list

Module 15. Prioritizing self-care: Lessons learned from a surprise birthday celebration in the hospital

Module 16. Creating lasting change: Lessons learned from life’s awesome and absurd moments